Saturday, March 24, 2001

This is really funny. I got it from the big white guy in hong kong, who got it from metafilter

The poor bastard is on earthlink, so they'll likely take his bandwidth away if cruel picks it up.
Okay. Mr Embrace-the-Situation wants his house back. Not that I have anything against Haley's friend Matt; he's very funny, courteous, etc, but the very fact of his presence makes me edgy. And Haley's been acting weird to boot. Always on, that sort of thing. I think she's wondering at it as much as I am. We're pretty private people, really, and this is a small house. He's here until sunday night, here without a car. Livi goes to her mom tomorrow and so I will be free to be a non-dad. But I am really low on money and won't be paid for another week or so. I think I have fifteen bucks, in fact ( a serious miscalculation... I may have been snookered, but it's likely just that I am a stoopid idiot all too Irish with his pocketbook). Anyway, I still have some of this very very good illicit substance which SHOULD BE FUCKING LEGAL and I very obviously need to smoke some of it and call it a day.

Oh, Livi and I went to the old cemetery on the hill tonight before grabbing burgers at the Skyline. It is a graveyard full of crumbling tombstones dating back 150 years or so. It made me all tingly to see graves from 1903 and earlier; dying before there was such a thing as a world war, an airplane, an interstate or McDonalds. Actaully, doesn't sound that bad. The weird thing is that in many ways their world had more in common with Homer's than mine.

KLF's version of Doctor Who wears out its welcome long before the song ends. Just thought I'd save you the fifteen minutes which would be better spent doing something. Anything.

Friday, March 23, 2001

Haley has a friend staying with us, a fellow she knew in LA. It's odd having a male friend of my fiancee staying on our couch, particularly since the visit has no specific purpose. They weren't romantic friends at all, although a few different people tried to set them up. We had our usual chaotic friday morning getting the dogs fed, Livi dressed, panckaed and taken to school, etc etc. I's kinda cool to see our domestic life through outsiders' eyes. But there is a tension nonetheless, and I am ever the gracious host but also a very territorial dog. I tend to embrace situations, though, and will embrace this one for whatever it has to offer. Just so long as it doesn't turn into a David Mamet play...

Thursday, March 22, 2001

I had to share this. Had to.
Once upon a time I got to play a good, solid practical joke on my friend Curtis. He was famous for never being tricked, seeing through everything, etc etc. So I started sending hime these garbled requests to illegally replicate CDs and DVDs in China and Russia. i changed my address in Outlook and would mimic these bad translation progams you see so much of. It was really funny, and might still be going on to this day but for my spilling the beans to him when we were up the catbird seat drinking (this was back in the days that the Uberhaus was a physical entity). The look on his face was worth at least ten dollars, and he made me show him the sent emails before he fully believed me. I had a great time doing it. Curtis used to be known by his friends as "The Reprimander" because of his... acuity? Assholoitude? I don't know, but he bought this one at full retail. I would bombard him with as many as six a week for a while.
And now you can do it yourself for only a fraction of the cost. I shudder to think how much time I've wasted with this diversion.
I am sitting looking out the window at a beautiful fuckin' day. And as I work from home for a company based in Hawaii, this is really bad. Particularly because the project upon which I am working requires complete and full concentration.
But at least I'm in front of the computer. I may not be working, but I'm inside.
I am off for a run through the woods. It's part of a new Spartan regime which I am getting into: clammy-assed oatmeal for breakfast, exercise of some sort and much more water than I have room for. Results will be a leaner me. Current me is hungry, sweaty and needs to pee all the time.
I wrote in a poem once:

The whip which served my father well
I know by feel alone

Ain't it the truth?

Wednesday, March 21, 2001

This is a pretty good use of Flash.

Now, I grabbed this from The Ultimate Insult, a featured blog and one of the most popular. I know very little about Red Dwarf except that it is a daily journal of all the weird, freaky shit that populates the net. I learned of All Your Base from Red Dwarf, as well as various other oddities. This is masssive version of The Cruel Site of the Day with many daily links. Is it a weblog? Sure. Is it personal? Sure. Do you learn anything about the person posting it? Well, maybe. I slog through several weblogs a day, checking to see if Eryca is talking to her ex-ex boyfriend yet, if Winnie has found a roommate, if Jeff is sick. It's a bunch of naked people dancing in front of windows. It's a bad accident that just happened. It's the girls' showers. It's everyone's diary open to read.
What's the motivation? I know that at least 500 people have looked at this page so far this month. I have not heard from any of them. Nor have I communicated to the dozens of people whose logs I read. It's lurkers lurking lurkers. I really should communicate more, but I barely have time to keep this up.
I used to keep a weird poetic diary on my site. People would sometimes contribute (I have a few friends I have never met from that source) but largely it was me. I was pretty fanatical about keeping it up... over two hundred entries in a year, most with graphics. Now I just do this.
Where am I going with this? God only knows.

Monday, March 19, 2001

There is a spirit which jumps from person to person. It can be benevolent, like the way you feel when you let someone in while driving down the road. Or it can be quite the opposite.

Just remember that rightous indignation is about the worst fucking thing on the planet.
I seemed to have, in my zeal, re-injured my back in that same old place. It's a small knot under my left rhomboid. I was showering (always an innocent and unrelated thing which sets these back spasms off, I hear) and my body was jolted as if by electricity. I found I was standing crooked and slouched, and while there was no immediate pain per se, I knew something was amiss. Fearing for my liver (after all, it was march 18th) I avoided pain meds, but subsequent hours revealed my old friend the dislocated rib was again making himself known. The original injury came from a tumble in Aikido several years ago where I landed flat on my back.

Chronic injuries are like telegrams from the past. In remembering that fall I remember all the specific details of that era in my life. I was much younger, still married and on the cusp of the hardest time of my life. I was coming of age, in a way. I was not yet a father and had only lived in this city for a few months. I remember taking the bus home to my shitty little house in Northeast, walking through Chinatown in the rain, walking through a city which no longer exists. I remember that I was working at a bar downtown and rediscovering drinking and, later, drugs.

So all in all, this back pain isn't so bad,
Just when this service begins to get popular I am blogging less and less. Ah, well. Let others slow doen this service for all I care!

I found the best way to beef up hits to a site is to go to and link to a picture of a sexy little thing. There will be 20,000 hits a day on some of them. Makes for an impressive webtrends anaysis, particularly if you title the directory something like "/aboutourcompany/" .

Got into a long conversation about the nature of creativity last night. I've ben so blasted happy lately I haven't felt the need to feed that part which sustained me for so long and through so much unhappiness. My slackness in web-logging is but one indicator; I've not written or drawn or made anything of note in months. This is very, very unlike me. I am a bit concerned. Laziness comes in dribs and drabs and before you know it you are hooked on Judge Judy twice a day.